In May, my friend Emily persuaded me to spend my monthly day off painting a mural in her new bedroom. Now, I raised an eyebrow at first, because I'd already painted three in her old room. But the hard fact remained, she was getting too big for that one and besides, it was going to be needed by her new baby bro. "I want Lions and monkeys" she said. "And I'd like you to paint them free-hand with acrylics. It's okay if the lion is a plagerised generic 1950's kinda deal, and if a third monkey escapes to another part of the room, say, to hang off the light switch".
I've painted on five walls in that house now. Enough is enough. I'm booking her father a vasectomy. I'll perform it myself if I have to.
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